Hollywood’s periodic attempts to co-opt the popular image of skiing usually result in straight-to-video disasters that do more damage than good to our sport’s reputation. Many of these cinematic train wrecks fall squarely in the ‘so-bad-it’s-awesome’ category, and a select few manage to capture the inherently epic culture of skiing. With that in mind, we present to you our Top 10 picks, in (more or less) descending order of greatness.
1. Aspen Extreme (1993)
This early ’90s gem scores major points with stunt skiing by Scott Schmidt and the late, great Doug Coombs, who star side-by-side in several truly epic scenes, one of which led to the coolest ski poster ever. Sure, the drama is overly cheesed and the cast unmemorable, but this movie has it all: Guys ripping bumps in jeans, cougars with names like Bryce Kellog, cocaine addiction, villainous Euro-dicks, and heroic redemption via Powder 8 Championships.
Classic quote: “We got a renegade going OB. We’re after him.”
2. Hot Dog The Movie (1984)
Truly a classic, this comedy calls out the good-time party side of skiing with a heavy emphasis on frontal nudity, recreational drug use, and politically incorrect ethnic stereotypes. With a dangerous dose of ski ballet, stretch pants, and twister-spreads, Hot Dog won’t disappoint those looking for quality ski action either. Euro-dick arch nemesis, you ask? Hot Dog’s reprehensible Rudy all but invented the role. The film’s Chinese Downhill climax continues to encourage poor decision making by skiers around the world.
Classic quote: “Yeah, best run of the morning, man. Hey, were you on ‘shrooms or what?”
3. Deep Winter (2008)
In his best performance since Reservoir Dogs, Michael Madsen plays a salty, alcoholic helicopter pilot in this painfully cliché tale of two childhood friends and their quest to pioneer a descent of Alaska’s most foreboding peak, Meteorite. Killer shred sequences featuring stunt riding by Seth Morrison, Dan Treadway and Shin Campos kept us paying attention despite the atrocious story line and piss-poor acting. Add in a crew of French stoners and the requisite Euro-dick profiteer bad guy, and you’ve got number three on our list.
4. Better Off Dead (1985)
Starring a young John Cusack, number four on our list is more an ’80s teen comedy than a legitimate piece of ski cinema. Still, we can’t resist the story of a high school loser on a mission to ski the uber-gnarly “K-12” in an effort to win back his girlfriend from the varsity ski-dick bad guy. As a bonus, Better Off Dead was filmed right in our backyard at Snowbird, UT.
Classic quote: “Go that way, really fast. If something gets in your way … turn.”
5. Downhill Racer (1969)
Way before Robert Redford set up shop in Sundance, UT, he starred alongside Gene Hackman in Downhill Racer. Redford reportedly did all his own skiing for the film, which is impressive considering the sketchy gear people used in 1969. Check this one out for a look into ski cinema history.
Tagline: “How fast must a man go, to get from where he’s at?”
6. Ski School (1991)
Anyone who has ever toiled at a resort for a season as a ski bum can identify with this classic film’s celebration of dirtbag royalty. The plot resembles Animal House on snow, with the underdog crew pitted against the uptight bad guys. Plenty of substance abuse, nudity, immature humor, and righteous ripping make this the Caddy Shack of ski films.
Classic quote: “Skiing is partying; partying is skiing.”
7. Out Cold (2001)
Although not technically about skiing, Out Cold gets the nod mainly because it doesn’t suck. It’s actually pretty damn funny and manages to capture the essence of the mountain-bum lifestyle. While the film lacks any real ripping, the casting of Zach Galifianakis alone earns this snowboard comedy a Top-10 spot.
Classic Quote: “Can you get an STD from a polar bear?”
8.Shredder (2003)
In this film a group of coeds head to the mountains for a weekend of snowboarding and debauchery, only to be ruthlessly slaughtered by a psychotic skier. We’re not going to sugarcoat it: This movie is downright terrible. But the premise is simply awesome.
Tagline: “Death to Snowboarders”
9. Frozen (2010)
We have yet to see this movie in its entirety, but the trailer suggests the following plot: Two sexy female snowboarders lure a skier onto a late chairlift ride, only to get munsoned on the chair after the mountain closes for the better part of a week. Sounds awful right? We agree, yet this travesty inexplicably made it into Sundance.
10. Ski Trippin’ (2005)
Given its star-studded cast with the likes of Eddie Hustle, Poochman, and Tommy “Too Smoov,” we had high hopes for this self-proclaimed urban-themed ski comedy. But this movie is so bad, it’s actually … no wait, it’s still terrible.
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Best quote from Ski Trippin’ : “Skiin’? Nobody goes skiin’ on a ski trip!”
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Best dialog from Hot Dog:
“Rudy: You people… stay out of our way. You may ski on zat side OR on zat side, but stay out of zee meedle!
Dan O’Callahan: Hey, Rudy, you can kiss my ass. Not on zis side and not on zat side, but right in zee meedle! ”
nice work Dan
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“Now there’s a girl I can really take advantage of.” – Hot Dog
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